Inebriated

Old habits die hard.

FADE IN:

INT. CALL CENTER - DAY
STEVE, overlooked, overworked, witty, watches the coffee machine fill his mug. His headset is on and his clothes are pristine. Behind him, his coworkers sit in their cubicles answering calls and glancing at the clock. 

Across the room enters EMILY, young and beautiful, everything Steve’s ever wanted. She leans against a man’s cubicle and chats with him.

Steve scowls. BECKY, female version of Steve, approaches Steve and cautiously stands beside him. 

BECKY
I’ve heard when men spread their legs,
it’s a sign of dominance.

STEVE
(distracted)
Uh huh. 

BECKY
It’s a stereotype that women only want that, but I
know girls who love nice guys like you. 

Becky grins and waits expectantly. Emily leaves. Steve watches her go longingly. 

STEVE
Yep. Thanks Beck.

Steve grabs his coffee and walks away. Becky watches him go longingly. 

INT. CALL CENTER - STEVE’S DESK - MOMENTS LATER
Steve plops down at his desk and prepares for work, but pauses. Could he be dominant? He sneaks a glance at the cool coworker and tries to replicate his posture.

Just when he’s sunken in his chair, legs awkwardly spread wide, a beep in his headset startles him. 

Steve looks at his computer. There’s a call coming in. He quickly straightens up and answers. 

STEVE
Shitty company with cool name help desk department.
My name is Steve, how may I help you?

CUSTOMER (O.S.)
My computer isn’t working! Fix it. 

Steve cradles his head. It’s going to be a long day.

Time moves forward, all the calls Steve’s taking blurring into one loud chorus of complaints. By the time five o’ clock rolls around, he’s exhausted. 

INT. CALL CENTER - STEVE’S DESK - EVENING
Steve removes his headset and leans back in his chair. He just needs to close his eyes for a few moments. 

BECKY
Are you coming out tonight?

STEVE
(startled)
Jesus, Beck! Uh...I don’t know. I always feel like a
train wreck after. I might sk...

Emily walks by with two other girls, all dressed in short skirts and dresses. Steve perks up.

STEVE (CONT’D)
...show up early.

BECKY
Great! I’ll see you there!

Becky skips away, ecstatic. Steve stands and walks slowly to the exit. He takes a breath before stepping through, and when he does...

INT. BAR - NIGHT
The world becomes the bar. Thumping music accentuates Steve’s steps as he makes his way around groups of people to the bar. 

Emily stands nearby with three other guys, laughing and smiling. Steve’s shoulders slouch. 

BARTENDER
What’s got you down?

Steve nods towards Emily.

STEVE
The usual.

BARTENDER
Tough luck buddy. What d’ya want to numb the pain?

STEVE
The usual.

The Bartender steps away and returns a few moments later with a beer. He slides it towards Steve, who wastes no time putting it to his lips and downing the entire thing. 

BARTENDER
Half off tonight. 

STEVE
I’ll keep that in mind. 

Steve gazes towards Emily, yearning for interaction. He raises his hand, stopping the Bartender before he can step away. 

STEVE (CONT’D)
One more. 

Steve catches the mug and settles in. Perhaps he’ll sip it slowly, bide his time until he gets a chance to interact with her. 

INT. BAR - MONTAGE
Time speeds up as Steve waits for his opportunity. The mug quickly empties, the bartender refills it. Emily chats happily with the men. As more time passes, the world becomes sparkly and saturated with color; Steve’s new, confident point of view. 

INT. BAR - LATER
Emily and the men look as though they’re about to leave. Steve erratically flags down the Bartender.

STEVE
Fuck me up, Keep.

The Bartender looks concerned, but doesn’t act. He grabs something without looking away. 

BARTENDER
The Atomic. Drink up. 

Steve downs the green drink, coming away with a puckered face. 

INT. BAR - MOMENTS LATER 

In this saturated, sparkling world, Emily walks towards the door with three big guys. While they’re confident, happy, Emily looks unsure. Steve steps between the group and the door, scowling. 

STEVE
Plenty of other bars to take your cousins out for a date. Fuck off.

MAN #1
What’d you say, punk?

Steve puffs out his chest and gets face-to-face with Man #1.

Suddenly the world is drab and grey; how it really looks. Steve is a wreck, his mouth hangs lopsided. The guys are unimpressed. 

The world becomes saturated with Steve’s confidence once more. 

MAN #2
Bro, it’s not worth it! Let’s bounce. 

The men scamper away. 

Back in the real world, it seems they only glower at Steve. 

MAN #1
Your lucky day.

He collides with Steve’s shoulder as he follows his friends outside. 

EMILY
(to Steve)
You didn’t have to do that, you know. 

Steve’s confidence saturates the world. He truly did a good deed. 

STEVE
Oh, I did. Part of the job description. Someone has to come between you and those goons. 

EMILY
Those ‘goons’ were my friends. 

STEVE
Whoa, okay. So how many of those goons did you fuck? 

Emily is outraged. Did he really just say that? She slaps him across the cheek and storms out. 

INT. BAR - MOMENTS LATER
Steve saunters up to the bar triumphantly. 

STEVE
Did you see my moves out there? 

BARTENDER
(uninterested)
Uh huh. 

STEVE
Hit me. 

BARTENDER
I think you’ve had enough, buddy. 

Steve presents his credit card. 

STEVE
I’ll double your tip. 

The Bartender takes the card. 

BARTENDER
Say no more. 

Steve catches the beer and chugs it. He wipes his mouth and looks around, then zeroes in on his target: Becky. She sits alone at the bar, petite drink in hand. 

Steve sashays towards her and her eyes grow wide, whether in arousal or fear is unknown. 

INT. BATHROOM - MORNING
Small bathroom covered in puke. Steve lays in the bathtub with only his underwear on. He wakes up, looks around, gags at the smell pervading the room. He struggles to pull himself from the tub and collapses on the floor. 

STEVE
Ugh. Not again.

He opens a cabinet and retrieves a towel. He cleans himself off and spins around, startled to find Becky passed out, hanging onto the side of the toilet. 

STEVE (CONT’D)
Ugh. Not again. 

He pulls out a clean towel and tosses it at Becky’s feet. He retrieves his clothes and begins getting dressed while leaving. 

EXT. FRONT PORCH - MORNING
Steve finishes buttoning his shirt as he steps onto the porch, then winces in the sunlight. He pats his pockets and retrieves his phone, looking at the time. Uh oh. Three missed calls and a voicemail from Emily? He plays the recording. 

EMILY (V.O.)
Hey...I was thinking about what you said when you called last night.
Do people really think I’m a slut? Because, if that’s
how you see me, is that how the rest of the office sees me?
I...I don’t know. I’m sorry. I’m still drunk. I-I’m sorry. I’ll go. Bye. 

Steve throws a mini-tantrum on the porch. He called Emily? He quickly dials her number and waits for her to answer, but it rings until it goes to voicemail.

STEVE
Hey! I’m so sorry about anything I said. I want to apologize, but not over the phone. If you still want to talk, can you meet me? Same place, same time?...Yeah. Thanks. 

Steve hangs up, then continues the tantrum.

STEVE (CONT’D)
(to himself)
That’s it! No more drinking! You’re sober from now on!

INT. BAR - EVENING
Steve and Emily sit at the bar. A pitcher of beer sits between them, almost empty. Steve picks it up and pours the remainder in his glass. 

STEVE (CONT’D)
And that’s when he handed me The Atomic! I don’t even remember calling you last night. 

EMILY
Yeah, I was definitely confused. But uh, maybe you should slow down?

STEVE
Why? This is just beer. It isn’t going to mess me up like that monstrosity did last night. 

Emily smiles politely, but it quickly fades.

EMILY
(quietly)
I think I’m going to quit. 

A beat. 

Steve says nothing. He takes a sip. 

A beat. 

STEVE
Take this out of the weekend. 

He holds up his beer, talking to it directly. 

STEVE (CONT’D)
What else is there?

As Emily speaks, Steve seems more and more taken by her words. 

EMILY
I think I’m too old for getting wasted and blacked out every other week.
It was fun for a while, but look at everyone come Monday morning.
It looks like they’ve been through hell. We may be wasting our lives at
work, but we’re also wasting them on the weekends if we can’t even remember
what we’ve done, and regret the things we do remember. 

They look at each other. Perhaps she got through to him. 

BARTENDER
Another pitcher?

The Bartender places a pitcher between them. They each fill their glasses, then clink them.

INT. OFFICE - MORNING
Steve stands at the coffee machine, languid and hungover. His headset is on sideways and his clothes are disheveled. 

Emily walks in, her hair in a messy ponytail and no makeup on. The cool coworker whistles at her, but she only lowers her head in shame and hurries away.

Becky approaches Steve and playfully straightens his headset. 

BECKY
Want to grab a few pints on Friday?

Steve is busy watching Emily leave. 

STEVE
(distracted)
Uh huh.

Steve grabs his coffee and staggers away. Becky watches him go longingly. 

FADE OUT: